The Introverted Owls

It's very easy to be busy in our lives and put our mental health at the very bottom of our list of priorities, if we put it at all. Our minds are extraordinary, but we need to guide them to recognize certain patterns because they won't do it on their own.  Our daily behavior is a perfect indicator of our mental health and one of the many habits we need to keep an eye on is called emotional mirroring. What Is Mirroring? First, you need to keep in mind what is meant by mirroring. It is exactly what the term implies—the behavior in which one person tends to imitate another person's attitude. This can include the way someone speaks, makes eye contact, or makes certain gestures with their hands.  When we mirror someone, we aren't really aware that we're doing it unless it is pointed out. Our bodies tend to do that as a way to build rapport and it's a sign that you're comfortable within your social setting. It is a good thing.  What Is Emotional Mirroring? Based o...

People are complicated. Personalities are complex, to say the least. Why was there a sudden peak of interest in personality typing and testing the last couple of years? I believe that it's because when we struggle in life, we desperately want to look for a guidebook that strictly defines us and tells us what to do or who we are.  In this search, we fell into a few traps. There are many misconceptions about personality tests out there. Some people even claimed the famous Myers-Briggs test debunked from all precision whatsoever.  I think it's all about your perception of what these tests represent. Here are a few points from my personal opinion that might clear the air: Personality tests are a guide, rather than facts set in stone. If you deal with your personality test results like they are facts that cannot change, you will be disappointed. This is simply because there are many elements like upbringing, life situations, experience, and trauma that shape us and change us consta...

Ever wonder what kind of role you play when you handle conflict? Not a lot of people would give this a moment's thought unless directly asked. We tend to handle a range of different conflicts in our lives, from the personal to the professional, as we encounter them. Not being aware of how our mind chooses to solve problems is what drags us and our opponents into an endless dilemma known as the Drama Triangle, simplified as follows:  What Is the Drama Triangle? All the way back during the late 1960's, psychologist Stephen Karpman described three basic roles (forming an upside down triangle) that people take on during complex interactions with one another. These roles do not define how people are generally; however, if they are not aware of their actions, they can easily be sucked into a never-ending cycle with no way out.  Karpman's dreaded drama triangle limits our abilities to lead healthy stress-free lives. Our minds unconsciously feed on self-punishing or self-satisfying...

It's not easy being an empath. You constantly feel like your senses are heightened and on edge with feelings and problems that most of the time are not ever yours to process. While empaths absorb other people's emotions as their own, they can just as easily absorb all the negativity and fear in the world. Living through a global pandemic will surely not make things any simpler.  There are many types of empaths and it's very eye-opening when you find out which one you are. Your mind could even be wired to be a mix of more than one type. The next step is figuring out how to avoid compassion fatigue , the downside of experiencing too much emotional empathy for someone or something.  The trick is to take care of yourself a little more and build a sort of balance in your life. There are a few things you can do continuously to achieve that. You might think they are too simple, yes, but they work. So, how do empaths recharge? Here are 5 secrets for empaths to unwind an...

With all this talk about isolation and social distancing in light of the Coronavirus pandemic, it was naturally assumed by the entire world, introverts included, that it's the year of the introverts. Endless memes swarmed social media about how an introvert's normal lifestyle has become the new cool. We introverts are guilty of sharing a few too!  It is sufficient for a good laugh in a time of uncertainty. However, as reality set in, it would seem that things are not as rainbows and butterflies for introverts as everyone expected. There is no doubt quarantine is hell for extroverts who thrive on socializing, but you would be surprised how difficult it can be for introverts as well. Check out these 4 misconceptions about introverts in quarantine: 1. Introverts Are Living the Time of Their Lives No, we are definitely not having a blast and living our dream life during this crisis. In fact, it's safe to assume that no one is. The advantage introverts have in such times ...

Confrontation is a terrifying concept for introverts. We don't face how we feel head-on and we always need time to process things. So when something happens that upsets us, we simply don't know how to voice our feelings about it on the spot. Our defense mechanism is staying quiet about it, acting like there's nothing wrong, and keeping it lingering in our thoughts.  How introverts deal with conflict goes something like this: 1. Someone says something or does something hurtful.  2. The first instinct of an introvert is not reacting, mostly because they will be in shock of what took place. They go numb and not mention anything about the incident.  3. Overthinking starts to overwhelm them, which could go on for days. Details get blown out of proportion as they start to analyze the situation thoroughly. The other person has no idea. 4. They decide they are really upset about this. 5. They want to confront that person but chicken out every time because the...

Maybe you have always seen yourself as a perfectionist, and maybe not. Contrary to popular belief, most people cannot identify their own traits that characterize them as indeed perfectionists. The obvious reasons, such as being a highly-organized person, are not the main issue; check out these  5 Little-Known Signs of Perfectionism .  Now that you can recognize the pattern, it's time to learn how to overcome your perfectionism. The key is to learn about some tricks and try to gradually incorporate them into your daily life. Eventually, they will become habits. Here are a few tips on how to overcome being a perfectionist: 1. Return to Earth Perfectionism affects your thoughts and feelings, which naturally alters your behavior. It gives you permission to set insanely unrealistic standards for yourself and others, which makes you very critical (mostly of yourself). Your goal is to shift your mindset a bit and get back to reality.  Start by consciously setting...

Do you see yourself as a perfectionist? Do you often catch yourself not being satisfied with anything you achieve, always wanting to go that extra mile towards perfection? It's common for perfectionists to not see themselves as such. You can easily confuse being a high-achiever with being a perfectionist.  Psychologists define perfectionism as a personality trait in which the person sets for themselves excessively unrealistic standards and strives towards absolute flawlessness. Perfectionists tend to be very critical of themselves and others; they are known to be quite picky. Perfectionism is widely misinterpreted as a type of healthy motivator to achieve your goals when, in fact, it's the exact opposite. Anxiety, anger, overthinking, and rigidness are just some of the traits associated with it. There's a great cost to being a perfectionist, no doubt. Your perfectionism tendencies don't arise from a need to be perfect; they are rooted from a deep feeling of not...

It's easy to assume that all extroverts are the same. When the word extrovert comes to mind, you would probably associate it with someone who is social and outgoing, someone who has no problem speaking their mind. While that's true, it might come as a surprise to learn that each extroverted personality has a specific preference when it comes to communication. This information could come in handy the next time you interact with your extroverted friends or your extroverted boss. You can check the Preferred Interaction Styles of Introverts from our last post. Similarly, there are 8 Extroverted Personalities as described in the Myers-Briggs Type Instrument (MBTI) . These personalities are divided as such based on  Sensing and INtuition; Thinking and Feeling; Judging and Perceiving personality traits. The Interaction Style Module, created by psychologist and typologist Linda Berens,  divides extroverts into two categories: 1. Get-Things-Going Interaction Style (ENFP, E...

There are many reasons why it's important to be mindful about what affects your energy . What you choose to eat and whether or not you  exercise are great factors to consider, no doubt, yet most of us seem to forget other equally important aspects. The rhythm of our thoughts, emotions, and feelings go side by side with our energy. The environment we are in and the people we interact with decide how peaceful or how stressful we are .  Stress depletes our energy. Negativity depletes our energy. You could also be giving too much of your energy away to the point that so little or none at all remains for you, which is common for empaths and highly sensitive people . Empaths often experience compassion fatigue , which results from being too empathetic by nature. You could even be feeling what is known as an introvert hangover , which happens when an introvert personality gets too overwhelmed with external stimuli and doesn't spend enough time recharging .  We have to...

When we're young, most of us fall into the trap of choosing a university major and consequently a career based on what is expected of us. We feel an obligation to fulfill what our parents, for example, think we should be doing with our lives or choose a career that is seen as more prestigious by those around us than what we really want to do. Sometimes, the issue is deeper than that. It's the fact that we don't know ourselves enough at that early yet critical stage of our lives to grasp what works for us and our personalities . The reality is we spend more time at work than anywhere else. It's important to be happy and satisfied with the path we've chosen.  Consider yourself lucky if you figured out your personality type before settling on a career. But don't get too caught up on the timing, you can always follow your passion no matter what stage you're at. You just have to be brave enough to learn and start. Personally, I read up on introverts wa...

There are great Benefits to Knowing Your Personality Type . It opens doors for you that you didn't know you needed open, which signifies the beauty of self-awareness. You've probably wondered and tried to figure out at some point whether you're an introvert or an extrovert . This simple Breakdown of the Myers-Briggs Type Instrument (MBTI) shows that there are 8 Introverted Personalities and 8 Extroverted Personalities .  Usually, you'll find yourself leaning more towards one or the other. But what if it's not that easy?  You should know that none of us are 100% extroverts or 100% introverts. We all fall on a long spectrum. Even the most introverted people have their extroverted moments, and vice versa. The greatest misconception about introverts is that they're shy when in reality we just like to process things more in our heads before we speak, and we hate small talk! We look for deep and meaningful conversations. If you find yourself having s...

The idea of solo travel can be quite daunting to us introverts . Talking to strangers and meeting new people in unfamiliar territory are the basis of solo travel, so there are a lot of reasons to scare introverts away.  Anything outside of our comfort zone is intimidating at first, but once we pluck up the courage to step outside our bubble, there's no going back.   Here are 4 reasons why every introvert should try solo traveling : 1- It Helps You Get Out of Your Head We introverts tend to enjoy living in our heads. Our thoughts are our sanctuary. Our inner world is perfect for us. That means that if we are given the choice between staying in or being out there experiencing the world , we'll be happy with the former. There's nothing wrong with that, but a balance is needed. Traveling gives you the opportunity to step outside your head for a while and take in new experiences that force your thoughts in different directions. You get to do that on your own terms when you...

Empaths are all too familiar with the need to help someone in pain and make them feel better no matter the cost, even if it means we put their needs above our own.  It's who we are.  Every empath will probably have crossed paths with a narcissist or a few in their lives. Most empaths will have even ended up in a relationship with a narcissistic personality . The phrase "opposites attract" is quite fitting when it comes to narcissists and empaths . They are infinitely drawn towards each other. If you think about it, an empathic person represents the perfect victim to someone with narcissistic tendencies . On the same level, it would be very hard for an empath to avoid falling in their traps.   You have two extremely different personality types . Any relationship between them causes an endless amount of despair and emotional exhaustion , particularly to the empath . A common explanation for such a deadly attraction is simply because balance is required; it is ...

Contrary to what it may seem, e mpathy is quite complicated. It goes way beyond just sympathizing or feeling compassion for someone or about something. If you feel like you've always had the ability to truly put yourself in another person's shoes and feel what they're feeling like it's your own, you might be an empath . There are many different kinds of empathy .  Did you know that there are 6 different types of empaths ? Read on to discover which type of empath you may be:  1- The Emotional Empath This type of empaths is the most common one. If you're an emotional empath , it's very easy for you to feel other people's emotions and their effect within your own body. Your emotional state changes in a second to mimic the other person's emotions and feelings, no matter what your emotional state was before encountering them. 2- The Physical Empath Someone who is a physical empath will naturally pick up the energy of someone's body and feel ...